5 Tips on Making Long Distance Relationships Work

  It’s ruthless.   It’s brutal.   It can make even the most trusting people think twice about their partners on a regular basis, and could push the loyal and the faithful towards the brink of temptation.   Such is the torture that those who work abroad have to bear with every single day. Especially for Filipinos working in Australia, the thought of being so far away from home can strain even the strongest of relationships.   Does this mean that your long distance relationship has always been doomed?   Apparently not. A number of Filipino workers in Australia have wives, husbands, boyfriends, and girlfriends back home, but they still remain strong through the years. Here’s how they do it.   They keep their promises   A long distance relationship means that you both signed up knowing that a lot of trust would have to be invested, probably even more than when you are physically together.   One efficient way to kill that trust is to make promises that you just can’t keep. So when you say that you’ll be Skyping at a certain time, make sure you’re online, ready to start the video call. If you promise to leave a message each time you start your day, take the time to do that no matter how hectic your day is.   One failed promise will lead to others, and a whole string of broken promises, not the distance, will cut the relationship short.   Ask about the small things   So many couples in long distance relationships feel that because they in such a complicated situation now, then the petty stuff should be left alone. Before you know it, you leave out telling them about the important parts of your day just because the standards have been set a little too high, and you slowly drift apart from there.   More often than not, it’s actually the small things that could make you even closer to your partner. Asking about what the other person had for lunch for example, or telling her about how awful the guy next to you on the train smells, can somehow patch up that distance and could make you feel like you’re still back home.   Continue planning for the future   A lot of couples in long distance relationships concentrate too much on what’s happening now that they forget to think about what’s going to happen to their future. This makes matters worse, because they end up feeling bad about the distance. Even worse, they also fail to find something to look forward to.   Plan for the future and make every moment apart more than worth it.   Make the most out of your personal time   When couple start committing to their long distance relationships, they often fail to see opportunities and end up focusing on what’s missing. Unfortunately, the fact that the other person is miles away will not change at the moment.   Instead of dwelling on things that you can’t do anything about, start making the most out of your personal time instead. Read the book you’ve been meaning to finish, or finally catch up with friends that you haven’t seen in a while. This keeps your personal love tank full despite the absence of your significant other. Once your love tank is full, you have plenty more love to share once it’s time to talk to your partner.   Continue doing things together   Who says you can’t go out on dates when you’re not physically together? Physical presence is just one small part of having a relationship. It’s the emotional and mental processes that make it work at the end of the day.   This means that the distance must not stop you from doing things as a couple.   You can leave the video chat on while you cook dinner, or you can watch the same movie at the same time and chat while the film is playing. You can even go on your usual morning run with your partner on the other end of your earphones. You may be sweating it out like crazy, but at least you’re sweating it out together.   All it takes is a little creativity and a whole lot of commitment. Once the long distance relationship is under way, there are only two routes to take. Start looking for reasons why this is so hard, or start doing something to make it all easier.   Special thanks to Mayur Patel for the main image.
Rica J

I am a mother, a wife and a technology loving Filipina who loves reading hi-fiction books (dragons!) , good stories, dancing, laughter, lying on the grass and eating balut. I am born and raised in the Philippines and now resides in Australia but finds myself in the Philippines for at least 3 months a year. I am part of the Filipino Australian Community and have been living between Australia and the Philippines since 2007.

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